Need some help thinking of pretend play ideas to work on attention span goals with your child?  I sat with my own daughters and came up with a list of ideas to try.  Feel free to comment below with more good imagination games!  Happy playing!
 
Imaginative Play Ideas
 

• Rocket ship to space
• Explore new planets/aliens
• Scuba diving – explore underwater
• Detective, find clues to a mystery
• Grocery Store
• Circus
• Build a snowman/ snowball fights
• Knight fighting dragon, rescue princess
• Veterinarian
• Doctor
• Cooking Show
• Zoo
• Landscape designer
• Playground designer
• Fashion Designer/ Fashion Show
• Beauty Spa (Nails, Massage, Shave?)
• Time Machine – Dinosaur time
• Farmer – milk cows, sheer sheep, collect eggs etc.
• Pilot
• Riding on a river in amazon
• Hunting
• Sports
• Olympics
• Eskimos, ice fishing
• Mermaids
• Rockstar – band
• Learning to drive
• Pet store
• Abominable snowman/ Monsters
• Treasure Hunt
• Pirates
• Wizards, make a potion or spell book
• Fishing
• Planning a party, having a party
• Holidays
• Hair stylist
• Dentist
• Dancing with the stars
• Catching butterflies
• Library (organize and check out books)
• Going to a museum or starting a museum
• Gardening
• Going to an amusement park
• Going to beach, swimming
• Super Heroes
• Firefighter
• Policeman
• Godzilla (building small towns and destroying them)
• Being Giants
• Being Tiny people
• Wizard of Oz
• Any stories from books or TV
• Going to India
• Going on an African Safari
• Being an early American Indian
• Camping
• Making a map of the neighborhood
• Car wash (for small cars) or a big pretend car

 

 Hello wonderful friends, I’ve missed talking to you all. I have been traveling the country and visiting special friends all over the place. Just recently I had a new addition to my extended family, a nephew was born. As I was holding this beautiful child I started thinking of all the things I would love to share with him and what kind of world I wanted him to experience. 

Then I remembered a Q&A I did with a family who had a variety of different therapists working with their child and how they asked me all kinds of questions about what tasks I was focusing on with this little boy, what did I want him to learn? I told them I was focusing on the relationship, and I wanted him to learn that people were “cool” and the world was a fun place to be in and that was the most important thing to teach him. I saw them all nodding their heads and scribbling notes as if a light bulb just popped on, to think that liking people might be more important than stacking blocks, what an awesome concept!!!!

I smile now, but it really is an important concept to remember. Autistic children have a hard time in our “real” world. People are not predictable, or easy to understand. Other things are so much more controllable. One of our most important “tasks” when working with these children is to show them how easy people can be, how fun, how helpful, how worthwhile it is to share time with another person. I want you to always be thinking of what kind of world you are showing your child. I hope that it is one of joy, excitement, and of course love.

Wishing you all a happy holiday season!
Love,
Katrina

I received my degree in Family Social Science 10 years ago.  After graduation I was slightly disappointed in myself for not getting a degree in something more practical, or even something with a license.  Now I see how fitting this degree really was for me as I truly have the heart of a family social scientist.

I love watching families, children, and parents... individually and dynamically.  How are they working together? How are they connecting? How are they thriving? What is getting in the way of connection, happiness, and balance? 

 Added to this I have extensive training in autism developmental play therapy, an approach that respects the child and asks for mostly love and curiosity in the workers (mainly parents.) This works hand in hand with my family social science background as I see each client on a systematic level interacting with their environment, family, and community as best they can in the bodies and with the brains they were given.

Then after all of that I too became a parent.  I had my own child to be fascinated with: with her development, personality, and world perception. Parenting changed my career path like nothing else.  I realized after becoming a parent that the most helpful thing a parent can have is trust in themselves.  Which is hard sometimes when there are millions of parenting styles, developmental approaches, and other people to push their advice on you.  On top of that, each child is so different that you can not possibly compare any one to another.  This I learned from the birth of my second child.  She was so different on day one from my oldest that I had to completely drop my old paradigm believing that nurture was more impactful than nature. While parenting is important, it was and is so obvious to me that my girls are very much wired differently. This means I have to parent them differently. Which I am still learning, is totally okay to do.

Sometimes I think we as parents get so caught up in what we "should" do with our kids that we stop paying attention for ourselves to what actually works with our kids.  We also expect ourselves to have all the answers right now and we put all sorts of expectations on our kids to respond consistently.  When they don't it can create battles, power struggles, guilt, and lack of trust in ourselves as parents.  On top of that there is usually two parents involved somehow (not to mention in-laws), so there are multiple ideas on how to parent.  This can create a whole other level or power struggles, confusion, and guilt. (Okay I can't really say that I'm speaking for everyone here, but it definitely feels like this for me sometimes).

This is where I think its kind of fun to let my social scientist step in.  Instead of acting as if all of my parenting methods are set in stone, I am constantly tweaking them.  First of all you should know that I have a belief that there is no one perfect way to raise a child. I also have a belief that we chose our families and lives for a reason and that all of life's lessons have value even if they can't be seen in the short term.  I also believe that I am human and not perfect and that's okay, but that I also have the ability to change my response and attitude in each moment. 

So with these beliefs I give myself the freedom to explore parenting techniques for each of my children individually and respectfully. Sometimes some techniques work better than others and I note that in my head and may or may not use that technique again.  Once I find techniques that work, I use them on a regular basis (noticing when they don't work well and possibly tweaking them again).   My children are still young so I won't pretend that I know everything about raising children.  However I know that this is working well for my family and it feels a whole lot better than allowing myself to feel insecure about my parenting being different from someone else's.

To those of you with children with autism this is how I would recommend running home based play programs as well.  There are a lot of different professionals out there who will tell you a lot of different ways to raise or help your child.  However each child with autism is so different and YOU know them better than anyone.  As long as you are approaching your child with love and respect, it is more than okay to experiment with different methods that make sense to you.  Just pay attention to your child and see if it helps him/her connect, stay balanced, and grow.  Let your child be your guide with what works and what doesn't.

I wish you all ease, trust, and happiness in your own parenting.  Please let me know if I can ever be of service to you.

Best wishes,
Katrina

Every time I finish my work with a client it is bittersweet.  There are so many memories that we share, so many smiles we had, so much challenge, so much encouragement, so much victory.  And then I leave, never knowing when or how often I will see them again.  The nature of my work is that this happens often for me.  Families usually hire me for short term inspiration. When I work with their children I come, I play, I laugh, I leave.  No matter how short my time with them though each child leaves a lasting impression on my soul and teaches me so much about life and how to help future children.

This past week was slightly different.  For the last year I have had the opportunity to once again be a part of a full time team. I played with Swames, (my name changed friend with autism) twice a week creating games, having adventures, or sometimes just spending hours building lincoln logs. Now our paths are both changing, and he's headed towards school!  I'm squeaking with excitement for this new stage and yet I will miss one of my closest little buddies who again has taught me so much.

When I first started working with Swames using play-based therapy he hardly looked at me.  He had a fairly lengthy attention span but was not open to many games.  He also had a large vocabulary but he couldn't hold a conversation.  Wow, have times changed! I've also changed a lot too.  Having the opportunity to once again work with a child intensively for so long gave me the freedom and flexibility to experiment with and discover new techniques and really have the time to see them work.  I was able to redirect my business and help families even more after I discovered my new found techniques.  (Short version - the relationship is so important, the rest of the techniques are secondary!)  This lead me to take on new clients using the new techniques - and wowee, there is so much you can accomplish through play and acceptance!

Swames was there for me in a hectic time in my life just as much as I was for him.  When I first started with him he would climb all over his Mom while we talked telling her how much he loved her.  I would always smile, loving that relationship they had.  A couple of months ago he started doing the same to me.  Now I am frequently told as the door is answered, and throughout my sessions how much I am loved.  And I love that monkey right back!

Swames has reminded me all about the roller coaster ride of change and recovery.  Some weeks there are huge changes, some weeks it is slower, and some weeks might be all about the joining.  You can't judge anything about what you see on the outside because it really is a journey and each child goes at their own speed.  Each phase is just as important with rebuilding the brain, you need the slow times to pave the way for the fast times.

That's why its important to document your journey, keep track (even if its just yourself in a journal) of all the little changes - they add up to big ones!  I worked with Swames (with the rest of our all star team) on so many levels.  Now Swames looks nearly constantly, he can have a conversation for hours.  He is open to trying new things, he role plays, he negotiates, sometimes it seems there is nothing he can't do!

As he now starts on the next leg of his journey transitioning to school, I know that there will continue to be challenges. However he has the foundational skills, the courage and the confidence to tackle them. With his team continuing to work on the nuances that present themselves I have no doubt that my little Swames is set up to be a superstar in his life!  

I'm so excited for all that you will do Swames, I can't wait to hear about it.  I will be cheering you on from here!
Thank you so much for all you taught me and for being my friend!


love, love, love, 
Katrina

More and more parents of children with autism are realizing that in order to get the kind of child centered therapy with the gratifying results they've dreamed of they have to take matters into their own hands.  Schools and therapy centers unfortunately do not have the time, resources, or dedication to make as much of an impact as caregivers can at home.  So, how does one go about starting their own home play based therapy program?

1. Commit to trying a home program out.  (Making the decision and following through is one of the most powerful things you can do.)
2. Find a place in your house that you can work with your child. (A quiet non-distracting room is best, but playing with your child is the most important, don't wait until you have the perfect room.)
3. Designate a time that you will play with your child 1 on 1, uninterrupted. (This is the hardest part, if you can do this, you can do a home therapy program!)  It's simply about making your child the priority for that time, decide to wait to do the dishes, turn off the TV, ignore facebook and your emails and give your child your undivided attention for at least 30 minutes.  
4. Go play!  When you are playing, focus completely on your child.  If your mind wanders to something else, acknowledge it, but then go back to focusing on your child.  Really play for the benefit of enjoying and learning about your child.  What makes them laugh, what makes them pause, what makes them back away?  Try to be responsive and respectful.  I often think of this type of play as "the golden rule", play with your child as you would have someone play with you.   If they seem to enjoy what is happening, keep going, add even more goofiness!   If your child is unresponsive and seems as if they aren't into the interaction, back off and find a way to enjoy what they are doing with them (or the same thing across the room) until them become interactive again.  Being respectful of your child's verbal or non-verbal no is just as important as the interactions themselves in creating a relationship.  Be easy on yourself, "dance like no one is watching," and reconnect to the give and take of childhood play.  (Here are some easy go to games to try - tickle, balloons, bubbles, chase, horsey rides, or even better play something you know your child loves such as reenacting Star Wars)  Start with one idea and just add on more and more as you play.

That's the basics!  There are many more advanced techniques and lots of different types of developmental play based approaches to look into that have different ways of requesting and working on skills.  I find all of them have benefit, the key is to try them out and see which one works for your child.  Each child is different and will respond in different ways.   I really find that the more in tune you are with your child, and the more fun you are having and not worrying too much about goals, you will find ways to model the skills you want to teach and your child will pick them up naturally.

 You as the parent know more about your child then anyone, and because you love them and already have a relationship with them you are the perfect person to help them develop their relationship building skills in a supportive environment which is key for many children, especially those with autism.  I guarantee that the time you spend with your child in this way will be worth it to you and them!!!!!  I know that you have what it takes and all the resources you need to be successful in your home therapy program. If you find yourself looking for a little more guidance, an ear to bounce ideas off of, or a burst of inspiration. I am here for you.
 
Best wishes and Happy Playing!
Katrina